He was sitting in the bike lane dropping someone off. I slowed way down because there was no room to get by on the right. Then he started moving forward but had to stop bc of a red light. I rode passed him on the right making sure to NOT hit his car with my handlebars. My knee hit (rubbed?) his car. I stopped at the light.

He goes completely ape shit. Starts yelling at me about I hit his car on purpose and now he is going to kick my ass. He gets out of his car and comes charging at me screaming how I'm gonna get a beat down for fucking with his car.

This was yesterday morning at 7:30. On 1st Ave N at N 4th street.

Crazy mother f'er!

I always respond to people like that with " and explain to the cops how you hit a cyclist in the bike lane"

That usually diffuses them once they realize they are going to need to explain the contact.

There are definitely some crazy MF-ers out there. Something similar happened to me this last fall where I had no choice but to reach out and lean on the door of a car, as another pinched me between the two, with three outstretched fingers in a tripod form. The guy was screaming at me across his girlfriend (?) who was driving.
While im sure he thought he was justified, protecting his precious property, but it just appears psychotic when you know what is happening. Unless his car was made out of rust, with a thin veneer of paint, I couldnt have done anything to it.
Im sure she thought he was very macho.

Am I the only one who has wondered how deep the scratches would be if one were to rub ones front studded tire across someones door while knocking their side mirror off with ones foot as the person in the car is yelling at you?

I've dealt with jerks like this before. A guy on 2nd Ave S and 8th blatantly cut me off, to beat me to a red light to get in the right turn lane, so I backhanded his left rear light (silly, I know). Next thing I know, he takes his right turn, pulls over, and gets out of his car. My two friends and I pull our U locks out of our back pockets/belts, and just stand there and look at him. He immediately starts walking back to his car while muttering shit about bicyclists. Yes, I realize what I did was a poor choice, but all the same, there will always be those crazies out there who think playing Macho Man Awesome Tough Guy will be the best thing to do.


Fuckers.

I've wondered about the scratching too. I've had a couple instances where a car will try to squeeze between me and the curb to make a right turn. (Had they used their turn signal I would have moved left and given them room to make their turn.) When they pass by with just two inches to spare it would only take a few degrees of bars rotation to make studded tire contact with the rear panel: three-foot rule enforcement.

andy - these turning incidents happened on 2nd and what you describe happens on my commute home on 2nd all the time. They zoom ahead to cut you off and slam on the brakes for the red light. The road is usually pretty empty then so I go get in the left lane beside 'em and stare 'em down.

The sad thing is if that escalated and a cop was called the cop could have charged you with a misdemeanor for touching the guys car. Seriously. *personal knowledge*

Just try to be as zen as you can and breathe.

Yup, people go ape shit when you get near their private bubble. I remember my friend once touching the hood of a car (can't remember why) and the guy start yelling and blah blah blah. But a bum on the corner started yelling at him, and it felt good to know someone has our backs.

I just "act" like I'm mentally challenged and that usually defuses the situation. Riding a recumbent helps.

So how did you respond to the guy, Bat?

I'd like to think I'd start laughing hysterically at the guy's disproportionate response and pedal off, but I'd probably also be really angry.

Sure, it's the recumbant. Thanks for causing me to spit carrots all over my keyboard.

While walking to the bus stop at about 8 months pregnant last summer I was in a crosswalk with a walk signal and green light. This giant pickup turned into the crosswalk and I hopped out of the way and waved like I knew them and gave a big smile. They went apeshit crazy. The girl started to open the door when the dude DROVE THE TRUCK AT ME. I hopped (imagine giant pregnant lady) over a LRT construction jersey barrier into the construction zone to protect myself and started to 'run' away (waddle, waddle). If they had hit me, what would they say? Run down a pregnant lady in a crosswalk? Get a life people.

This whole thing really took me off my game. I did not ride yesterday and today I had this weird uncomfortable feeling that would not go away. That shit makes me uncomfortable and the feeling sticks.

The thing that is a bit creepy is that I do not remember what happened. I am usually pretty calm and can stick to my plan, which is to stay cool and ride on. I tried to tell the dude to chill, but when I saw him coming towards me I got off my bike and went towards him. I do not remember anything that I said, only that I stayed in his face until he was back in his car. I remember yelling at him through his window and then walking back towards my bike which was laying down in the street. I'm sure I was telling him to take his best shot and then called him a dick or a pussy or some other completely inappropriate names. I think I said something like, "Don't act like a hard on if you're just gonna run back to your car."

I do know that in my mind I told myself that I was going to treat this guy like a barking dog. Charge him and hope he runs away. If he keeps coming and tries to bite, take my best shot with a kick to the face. Or in this case I was going to wait for him to swing and then ram my helmeted head into his nose.

I just want to avoid this stuff all the time. It sucks.

I was at a red light on Franklin and Nic a few months ago and some dude in a truck was inching towards me on my left. I made eye contact, stared at him, and yet he kept getting closer. So I did a quick left jab at his passenger side window to let him know he was way too close. I have serious monkey arms, but if I can touch something with my fist it's within 3 feet.

He rolled down his window and was yelling at me for touching his car. I don't know if that upset him the most or me calling him a "pole smoking dickhole" but we both just kinda got amped up from there.

He kept yelling as he was driving in front of me and making some hand gestures. He pulled over onto a side street and looked like he wanted to get out to fight me or some equally stupid idea.

I chose to spare his ACL and whatever it is that stops your elbows from bending backwards and kept riding. I had to go to work, and while I could have easily fucked him up and still gotten there on time, I thought kickboxing in SPDs might not be the best idea on asphalt.

I remained rather worked up for almost an hour and realized that I shouldn't let some stupid trashy idiot get to me. I have since gone the opposite direction and been overly nice to people who have endangered my life. I identify myself, rank, and what agency I work for. They usually get nervous and apologize. I think that sinks in better than anger.

Holy shit to everything in this thread. People get crazy about nothing, and some people don't even notice when things actually happen.

I once was riding through rush hour downtown, apparently following a truck too closely, when they slammed on their brakes and i swerved as far as the cars in the other lane would allow me too, my handlebar hit and broke the trucks tail-light. I was ready to take full responsiblility, but they didn't even notice. So I just went on with my life.

I had NO idea that touching a car could get you into trouble. I knock on windows, slap hoods, kick doors, all the time when people do things such as Andy described and just keep riding. I like when cars have foldable side mirrors and they do something stupid and dangerous to me, I just fold them in as I go by. Which now that I think about it actually is a bad idea because then they have an even harder time seeing cyclists.

I'm also all too familiar with idiots getting out of cars and acting tough, then doing nothing but call you names and scream at you. Having a U-lock visa ble in your hand probably helps too.

Jerbear mentioned the staredown, I think that's the most common thing I do when I'm not happy with a motorized vehicle. They usually know why you're mad, I think.

Yikes! I'm glad I've never had to deal with a physical confrontation. The worst I've ever dealt with was a few summers ago; a woman was tailgating me on University under the rail bridge between Prior and Cleveland/Transfer. There was no shoulder and a bunch of potholes in the right lane (probably because of the bridge drain-off). She had her window down when we came up to the stoplight. I said to her (rather calmly) "Excuse me, but when you honk at a cyclist they'll be startled, and they might swerve in front of you." She let out the most violent horrible tirade I'd ever heard, threatened to run me over during the next block, threatened to swerve in front of me so the pick-up behind her could hit me, &c. &c. Scared me out of biking for the rest of the summer.

Now I avoid busy roads as much as possible, and I've worked on my stare-down. No-one expects a death glare to come from little ol' me.